Its been a whole six months since this big guy came into our lives and I have learnt so much just by being in his presence. I thought it was worth writing about , I hope you do too!
Nothing is ever a surprise to God.
I feared you, in fact I feared me. Would I be a good example? How would I protect you from the strife of life? What would you think of me? In my perfect world, you should have been older. I would have loved to hide behind a bigger brothers over protective love for his sister, but now I’m older and you have just arrived. Although you were entirely unexpected, God knew we needed you and gave you to us as a testimony that He makes everything beautiful in His time. We did not understand then, but slowly we getting it now. We getting you now, although you have this habit of throwing up on me before my interviews, I guess it’s just you wishing me good luck before I’m on my way? Well, it better be.
Growth should not be feared.
Listen, you’ve been a bit plus sized since birth. At times you out grew clothes in a week, we even had to exchange some of your baby shower gifts, because your figure blatantly laughed at 0-3 months. Physically you were flourishing. Unafraid, never uncomfortable in your skin. In fact at 2 months you were already throwing your weight around. Although, your still very young, through watching you grow, I have become unafraid of my own progress. Just like you, I have learnt to feed off from the environment I find myself in and I have allowed it to propel me into my future. Without worrying about the things that didn’t fit yesterday, but embracing who I am today. Here’s to growth!
Change is inevitable.
I thought I could avoid the talking to you thing, because truth is, I really suck at communicating with kids. In fact, I really suck with kids(future husband: ‘This will change man’), but you invaded my space, got in between my series time and made sure I’d have as little sleep as possible. I couldn’t love you less because of it. I did realize that I did not like change, especially in my ‘natural environment’. I had to accept that you were now revolutionizing my world, by force at a time, but I’m learning how to handle you. No more running away from change. I’m here and I’m constant, just not when your diaper needs to be change, cause damn! But nevertheless I’m here!
You can smile through pain.
You started teething very early. In my ignorance I thought you would walk first, but apparently I was wrong. I expected you to be all kinds of moody, but instead you would smile, even when in pain, you would smile. You wake up laughing, you go to sleep laughing. You are such a Joy, when everyone else warned us about what a nightmare teething was. You showed us otherwise. Now, you have only two, one of which is rather scew! But, needless to say, once again I have no excuse to shut down or moan and complain, when I too, go through life’s transitions. I’m learning.
5. To be fearless.
Every month you get stronger and stronger and even more braver than before. I have now watched you attempt to sit by yourself, more than once.You have attempted to jump out of your car seat to many times and now, you have even learnt how to kick your feet and jump in our arms whenever you hear music of any sort. Without fear of failure, you try these things. Without worrying about falling or hurting yourself, you try and try again. I am pretty confident that you will be walking in record time too. But for now I am striving to be just as fearless as you. Even through life’s twists and turns , even if the possibility of falling on my face still exist. I will cease the moment with childlike faith.
6. Expect the unexpected.
I have no idea what your next move is. Whether your hair will grow longer before your next batch of teeth protrude , or whether your new onesie will last you more than a week. With you I have no idea. But I look forward to watching you change and transform and I expect the unexpected from you always. You have taken the last 6 months and knocked my socks off with surprises. I am amped to see what you’ll teach me next.